Thursday, November 21, 2013

Plymouth Away : A defeat that was 12 years in the making, Bodyform for You and free tickets

Hello all

I trust all is well?

First of all, videos for the recent trips to Worcester (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03UZJOnX3UU) and Kidderminster.



Now, you may have noticed during the Worcester video (if you watched it) that I mention the I wanted to draw Plymouth away in the FA Cup First Round. Well, I sort of got my wish as we drew the Pilgrims at home and I would need the sides to draw at Sincil Bank to finally get my trip to Plymouth. Plymouth for me was like a holy grail of away days, not being it's a brilliant ground (although it is quite bad), not because it's the scene of a vital game, but no, it was because it is so f***ing far away that it is too much travelling for a random game.

I love going to random games when I get the chance and that is how I have gotten close to completely the 92. Infact, it's not only the 92 that has seen me visit randomly, infact, one of my favourite ever experiences for a non-Lincoln game was Witton Albion vs Sheffield FC in 2009. City had played Northwich is the FA Cup and as it was on TV, it was an early kick off, meaning that I could go to the nearby Witton Albion, a team literally a few hundred feet from Northwich. It was an amazing 3 hours at Witton Albion and the hosts won 3-0, which helped. I'll go into the day on another blog entry at some point.

The point being that random games are awesome, but they are ruined if they are too far away, and that's why I had to wait 12 years for the Imps to draw Plymouth in the cups. I had gone to the game the last time we played them in 2001 and that was before they redeveloped the ground, so in effect it was a new ground....whilst not being at the same time. I think I was the only person in Sincil Bank that was smiling when the initial game ended 0-0 and we were forced into a replay.

So anyway, it's 10:30 on Wednesday morning and I get picked up on the outskirts of Newark, meaning I got to effectively choose my seat on the coach, which was a good thing as it was a 29 seater and the one thing you ideally want if you are going to spent 14 of the next 18 hours on a coach is leg space.....I can assure you, when a 29 seater is full, there is precisely fuck all leg space.

Now, as you can imagine, a near 300 mile round trip ideally needs some entertainment. Some had DVDs, some chatted, and others slept....I on the other hand used my phone quite a bit and encountered a very strange post on Twitter. David Preece, Lincoln back up goalkeeper and coach, is one of the most unique people to follow on Twitter. He is often amusing, is extremely intelligent and could talk anyone around his way of thinking without majorly arguing.....then he posted this.....


Throughout the night I shouted this randomly at Sam Wray, who was sat directly in front of me. It fille a few hours. 7 hours and two stops at services later, we finally arrive at a very wet Home Park and all of a sudden Duncan Bayes is walking down the coach handing out free tickets for the match. Certainly can't complain about that happening. Whilst everyone else went to the pub, the club shop or whatever they wanted to do, I went straight into the ground and finally, a 12 year mission was complete.

Looking out at the ground was quite strange, but in a good way. It's the near perfect mix of new and old, with three quarters of the ground being your now common "bowl" style, so in many ways that part didn't feel like a new ground, however, the main feature of the ground is the old grandstand. This is a deceptively big stand that must have the highest view in League Two, although they have stopped using the terrace that was at the bottom of the stand, effectively making this an all-seated ground.




99 fans make the trip into the away end and only Nick Proctor, a person I have known for a few years, managed to avoid the free tickets and ended up paying to get into the ground, so in short, he is the only person I know of that actually paid to watch what was soon to happen.

So, the teams come out for the match, it kicks off and within five minutes the  Imps at 2-0 down. Excellent start. The first was a result of Paul Farman kicking it straight to Reuben Reid. Now, Farman is a good shot stopper, but sometimes he has a right nightmare in the Imps net, this was going to be one of those nights. The second came within seconds as Alessandro easily got around the back of the Imps defence and lifted it over Farman.

Miller came close to pulling one back for the Imps before Reuben Reid completed scored his second and third before half time, and it could have been far, far better. The second half is slightly better for the Imps as we only concede an own goal and almost see Nat Brown score from 30 yards, but the Imps are definitely never going to score.

Just before they announce added on time a few Plymouth fans come onto the pitch and stand right in front of the Imps fans, and despite staring at him, not a single steward do anything towards either of them. When asked by Lincoln fans, the response from the stewards was "We're not allowed to go onto the pitch to get them!" ..... what's the point of having stewards them.

Anyway, the match ends 5-0.

IF YOU WANT TO SEE CITY'S COMEDY DEFENDING, GO HERE - http://www.itv.com/news/westcountry/story/2013-11-21/argyle-thrash-lincoln/ 

Fans getting into lengthy discussions on the coach as the performance and a big argument breaks out about whether Simpson is the right man for the job, with the majority siding on NO. Eventually everyone, other than myself, drifts off to sleep. I think I was the only person on the coach, other than the drivers of course, who didn't go to sleep at all before getting back to Lincoln at just after 3:30am.

I was glad that the day was over and even happier that I hadn't paid for that match......unlike Nick.

Sunday, November 17, 2013

FACT : Simpson is doing worse than Holdsworth

Hello all

Who's ready for some statisfaction?

Just before I start, I just wanted to point out that none of the below is personal against Gary Simpson, it deals with pure, hard FACTS about this season compared to last.
Simpson

Just under two months ago the Imps lost 1-0 away at Hereford and I called the performance negative and Gary Simpson as a tactically poor manager. I suffered a torrent of abuse, but now as we approach the return game against the Bulls, I am slowly being proven right.

FACT NUMBER 1 : After the same amount of games under Holdsworth last season, we had more points and considerable higher up the league.

Since that game against Hereford, a game that was played on September 28th, the Imps have only won three out of the eleven subsequent games, and two of those were against teams who have only won one league game between them and sit bottom of their respective divisions (Hyde in the Skrill Premier and Worcester in the Skrill North)

The problem is that a lot of fans still seem to think Simpson is doing an excellent job, and without trying to sound funny, those people really need to climb from out of Simpson's arse and see the realise of the situation. A lot of people are so far up Simpson's arse because of his involvement with the Alexander era, well I have news for those people, this isn't 2005 anymore, this is 2013 and

FACT NUMBER 2 : We have failed to score in 9 of our 21 games this season, a failure rate of 42.8%. Our first 21 games last season saw us fail to score just 4 times, a comparatively measly 19%.

The problems come in all sorts of areas, but mainly up front. Other than Tomlinson, none of the strikers are performing. I'm not going to include Danny Rowe in this because he has spent most of the season so far injured, therefore it is unfair to include him, nor am I going to include the loanees.

Bohan Dixon is the joint second highest goalscorer with 3 goals, although ALL of them came against teams at the bottom of their respective divisions (2 vs Hyde and 1 vs Worcester). Often brought on to make a difference, it doesn't work.
Waide Fairhurst
Doesn't play because he doesn't score

Waide Fairhurst is a player that a lot of fans think hasn't had much of a chance. Here's a pure and simple fact for you, he has played in nine games, that's a fairly decent chance, and he hasn't scored in EIGHT of those games, in other words only converting in 11.1% of the matches he plays. Some people will point out that he mainly gets deployed in the midfield and that's why he doesn't score many, that point is nullified by the fact that two defenders also have two goals and a midfielder (Nolan) has three. So not only does he not score when he plays, he gets outscored by people who play in the same position he does, so saying he doesn't get a chance is bullshit.

Nick Wright came to us as a player that a lot of other fans in the Conference said was a cout for the club. 14 half-arsed performances later have resulted in a single goal, a rate of 7.1%. I can forgive strikers for not scoring if they at least try, it's why a lot of fans loved strikers such as Dave Cameron, but Nick Wright certainly does not fall into that category. If he just tries then he could probably be worth while, but at this rate I would be highly surprised if he stays beyond his current one year deal.

There is no getting away from the simply fact that the strikers aren't pulling their weight. Players such as Sean Newton, whom I personally think is by far the best player than Simpson has bought to the club (not a wide open category I must say), are putting crosses into the danger area, but the problem is that the strikers are never there. They are half-arsed in their approach into the box and the near perfect balls are wasted.

FACT THREE : Both Holdsworth and Simpson were taken to a replay by a Conference North side in their first full season as manager. Holdsworth's was against an impressive Halifax side that were eventually promoted and are currently chasing a second consecutive promotion. Simpson's Lincoln were taken to a replay by the side who are currently sat dead bottom of the division below. Both times City comfortably won the replay, but only one of the two managers has a reasonable excuse for being taken to a replay.

The shocking thing is that Holdsworth was regularly slated by fans and was treated like shit when the club went on an impressive winning run, receiving no credit from the fans as they gave all the credit to Grant Brown. It's amazing how one manager can go on a poor run and get taken apart by the fans, but another can go on a worse run and manager and yet someone still have a lot of people sticking up for him. The problem with a lot of their fans is that they have a very "you're either with us, or against us" mentality and if you have no previous connection to the club, you're instantly not good enough.

Last season people were very happy with how the season was going until January. At that point we started facing all of the teams at the top and rather unsurprisingly, lost those games. People were saying "we should never be losing 4-2 at home to a side like Newport!" That was a Newport side who won promotion at the end of that season and are having a reasonable first season in the Football League. Some fans really need to get out of this mentality that we are a big club at this level, because we really aren't.

FACT FOUR : When we got rid of Holdsworth, we were five points clear of the relegation zone, going into the final weekend under Simpson we were only three clear. In other words, we still had a reasonable gap when Holdsworth left and the results under Simpson left us still in danger of relegation going into the final day, something that wouldn't have happened if Simpson had been able to maintain the five point gap.

We have spent the vast majority of our existing in the lower divisons of the Football League, and there are plenty of sides bigger than us in this division. We have no define to do well and simply being professional in this division doesn't mean we have an automatic right to do well. Fans disrespect teams by calling them a glorified pub team just because we have always spent all of our history in divisions higher than them, but regardless of how you spin it, all clubs in the Conference deserve to be there. Either they have been one of the best sides in the non-league in recent years and earned their way up, or they have been too shit for the Football League and have been ejected. We deserve to be at this level and how can fans claim we deserve to be in the Football League when we are heading for a third straight season of finishing in the lower half of the

David Holdsworth
Got abused by fans by doing a better job that Simpson
is currently doing. Even got no credit during a lengthy
unbeaten run.
Simply put, whether people like it or not, Simpson is NOT better than Holdsworth. I excepted us to concede under Holdsworth, but we also scored on a considerably more regular basis, and at the end of the day, you don't win games without scoring. Football is about winning ladies and gentleman, but some people seem to have forgotten that.

That problem with Simpson is that it is very rarely that the club will go on an unbeaten run. The longest unbeaten run that Simpson has managed this season is 3 games, with the longest winless run being 7 games. Holdsworth did go 8 games without a win at the beginning of last season, but, by the same stage last season the Imps had just beaten Barrow, an 8th game without defeat in a run that eventually went to ten games before being ended in a trophy game by Barrow.

After the same amount of games in their first full seasons




PRO-HOLDSWORTH RELATED FACTS

  • Simpson's top goalscorer has fewer goals at the same stage than Holdsworth's did
    Vadaine Oliver
    Had scored three league goals by this same stage last
    season, more than all but one of the current crop
  • By this same stage last season, Holdsworth had more than one striker that had scored in more than one league game.
  • Scored in considerably more games
  • More points than at the same stage as last season
  • Had only conceded three or more on two occasions by the same stage in 2012/13. This season the same period has seen us concede three or more on three occasions.
  • By this stage last season we had an excellent record against sides who ended up in the promotion chase. By this stage we had faced Kidderminster, Newport, Mansfield and Wrexham, all of whom finished in the top five and we took seven points off of them. A points return of 58.33%. This season we have faced three of the current top five, losing to all three.
  • Considerably longer run of games without defeat
PRO-SIMPSON RELATED FACTS
  • More clean sheets
  • Ever so slightly shorter longest-winless streak

I challenge anyone who said I was wrong for criticising Simpson to argue with pure, hard FACTS (and not opinions) with the above.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

The worthless entity that is the Football League Show

Hello all

I want to start this entry with the very first thing that was said on the Football League Show back in August 2009.....

“Yes, good evening and a warm welcome to the brand new ‘Football League Show’ as we aim to bring you every goal across all three divisions. " - Manish Bhasin

Despite those ever so bold claims, the BBC have yet again failed to live up to them. They have decided not to have a Football League Show this week because there were no games in the Championship. Whilst it is not uncommon for the Championship to get larger coverage than Leagues One and Two, for the third time in quick succession the simple fact that the Championship wasn't active this weekend is enough to convince the BBC to not show the weekly edition of the poor man's Match of the Day.

Due to it being an international break, only games in Leagues One and Two were played, but apparently having 66.6% of the teams in the Football League playing isn't worth having an episode of The Football League Show. To put it into an even more ridiculous context, on the weekend of November 9th/10th, there was a Football League Show, that despite the fact that only the Championship played. So in other words, they are happy to show the highlights of all the divisions that played when the Championship teams have been in action, but as soon as they aren't playing then fuck the other 48 teams.

Imagine if Match of the Day has a full program of 10 games between the 20 Premier League sides, but Gary Lineker said at the beginning "There were many exciting, thrilling and controversial games in today's Premier League, but we are only showing games involving the top four as no-one beneath them matters." There would be an uproar because, at most, they would only be showing eight different teams, and therefore not the majority.

If the majority of the teams that you cover have played, then you owe it to those clubs to actually show the highlights of those teams. Don't get me wrong, if it was only a small number, i/e five games, then I and the majority would understand, but when 48 of the 72 teams do play, then you have no justifiable reason for not putting a show on, especially when you are happy to do it whenever only 24 teams play.

Then again, I'm not surprised given that the Football League Show has a reputation amongst fans as being very slack when it comes to doing their research, even when it comes to basic geography. In 2010 presenter Manish Bhasin said, and I quote, "Hereford made the short trip to Lincoln on Friday night." I'm not sure what map the writers of the show were looking at when they wrote that little nugget, but I assure you, Lincoln and Hereford are nowhere near each other and the drive between Lincoln and Hereford roughly takes three hours, and that is assuming you don't hit any traffic along the way. Based on that, I am not sure what scale they were using, but in no reasonable scale are Lincoln and Hereford close.

As you can see from the map, there are PLENTY of places closer to Lincoln than Hereford, and we don't class the majority of them as a derby, if we don't class Derby or Forest as a derby, why the hell would we class Hereford as a derby?

It's not just geography that they have got wrong though, it's simple facts. Here is one that they got wrong from earlier on this season. It's August and Portsmouth are starting life as a League Two club. Like the majority of people in the media, the FLS gets all giddy and starts treating them like they are something special, including making up completely bullshit facts to make them seem a lot more important than they are. In August Portsmouth had an attendance of 18,000odd, and according to the Football League Show that was a fourth tier record. It wasn't. I hate Hull but will happily defend that they comfortably beat Portsmouth's attendance when they were last at the level with numerous attendances of well over 20,000 - http://www.hullcity-mad.co.uk/results_fixtures/2003_2004/hull_city/index.shtml


This is also the same show that used to ask people to text/email in with their thoughts following their matches and they would regularly come out with golden and insightful comments such as "Steve, a Sheffield Wednesday fan, was unhappy that his side lost 6-0 today!" .... well fancy that, a fan being upset that his side lost 6-0. As ground breaking as that revelation was, are the Football League Show seriously suggesting that there were no comments that were a great insight into how a game went?

Chris Sutton or a BBC fuck up?
I'll let you decide
Infact, on the day Lincoln City were relegated I wrote in an email to The Football League Show, who had Lizzie Greenwood reading out the texts. I wrote a short three lines, basically summing up how gutting it was to be relegated and where it all went wrong for us.....within minutes I got a message back effectively mocking our relegation.

Fortunately they stopped all that nonsense.

Then we get onto Mark Clemmit, a sycophant who goes to watch a random game and spends 8/9 hours arse licking everyone around him, hoping to get a half decent interview with them, afterall, what sort of twat walks around with a camera at games trying to catch people out (self-mocking humour).

Don't get me wrong, I did used to like the "Potted History" section, but it quickly got very old. Unfortunately Clemmit's style is very much like a young children meeting his heroes for the first time.......but Clemmit isn't five years old and it comes off as strange.

He came to Lincoln City twice, the first of which was when Chris Sutton was appointed as manager, although the graphics team at the Football League Show obviously didn't bother quality checking the video package as our Chairman at the time (Steff Wright) was referred to as Chris Sutton in the graphics. It was really amateur stuff, it really was.

Then we get onto my final point. Steve fucking Claridge. Steve is generally disliked by the majority of
The Football League Show's relationship
with Steve Claridge
football fans. He is exceptionally dull, very rarely makes a valid point and is treated like a God by Bhasin when he is on the show. It got to the point that whenever Claridge came out of his numerous retirements, the Football League Show would actually go down and film his debut for his new club from the seventh tier of the non-League so that they could fill his ego.

No-one gives a fuck about Steve Claridge making his debut for Creek and Paddle FC in the Crapstone Faucet Company Division 6, so stop wasting the time of the people who watch the show and get on with the highlights of teams who you only show for five seconds anyway.

Let's not also forget the cherry picking of the aforementioned emails to find people who had asked him a question, just so he could talk about himself some more. "We have many emails here from fans up and down the country who has someone valuable to say, but first of all Michael from Castledon wants to ask Steve what his favourite type of cheese to push up his bottom is?"

Luckily, and now more regularly, they get Leroy Resenior in and he doesn't put up with people sucking up to him and actually know what he is talking about, unlike Claridge.

So, a few short but very important lessons for the Football League Show to learn


  1. The Football League consists of 72 teams, not just 24.
  2. Look at a map before you describe a match as a derby when the teams are at opposite ends of the country
  3. If you're going to put a graphic up with someone's name, put it against the right people.
  4. Do your research before you promote things as "facts"
  5. Don't pretend that all fans like Steve bloody Claridge


Seriously, get your act together. I could do a better job and I am armed with nothing more than a mobile phone, a laptop and ADOBE Premier Pro CS6.

Just for the record, here is the time that Mark Clemmit came to Sincil Bank to interview Chris Sutton for the Football League Show. What I especially love is after the match when Clemmit makes a big deal out of the DVD of the match and Sutton just puts it straight down in a "I don't really give a fuck" moment.